1. Your individual therapy is a safe place to explore your thoughts and feelings about what\u2019s going on <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nWhen you have a teen who needs mental health care, you have emotions to work through, too. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cDads often feel like it\u2019s a failure on their part,\u201d Nordean explained. \u201cI had a conversation with a dad last week who said, \u2018When my kid struggles, I take that as I failed as a parent, and I don\u2019t like that feeling, so I\u2019m going to fight against that, and it creates this kind of contention.\u2019\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Understanding your feelings means you can approach your family therapy more aware of these feelings, and what they mean so those sessions can be more effective. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dads need to understand that it\u2019s not their fault. <\/em> <\/p>\n\n\n\n\u201cWhen their kids need therapy, it doesn\u2019t mean dads are failures. It means their kids are human,\u201d Nordean adds. \u201cIf we can accept our kid\u2019s struggle and also share that with them \u2013 and share our own struggle \u2013 then we\u2019re going to have a lot better chance of connecting and getting through this difficult time together.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
2. Individual therapy gives dads the opportunity to grieve their \u201cideal child\u201d <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nWhen a baby is on the way, or a couple adopts, it\u2019s natural for new dads to imagine what their child will be like in the future. But the child you get may not match that ideal. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIf you want to play catch and that\u2019s the thing you really looked forward to, and your kid wants to play Legos and Minecraft because they can\u2019t throw a ball very well,\u201d Nordean says, \u201cthen that can be kind of heartbreaking for dads. So, they need to be able to let go of their expectations and just see their kid for who they are. That can be a process.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Part of accepting the child you have in front of you is grieving the ideal child you had in your mind. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Dads don\u2019t envision a teenager dealing with mental health conditions, addiction, eating disorders, depression, anxiety, or learning disabilities. To help that<\/em> child, you need to see them for who they are and believe that they are doing their best to feel safe and okay in the world that they live in. <\/p>\n\n\n\n3. When you\u2019re in therapy, you remove the stigma surrounding mental health treatment for your teen <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nIf your teen sees you working on your mental health, then it doesn\u2019t feel as shameful when they need to work on theirs. It normalizes therapy and focuses on the fact that we all have issues we need to address. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Everyone needs mental health support sometimes. Your teen needs it now, and you’re showing them that it\u2019s a good thing. We can teach our kids how to care for their health and build healthy relationships by how we care for ours. If it\u2019s a bad knee or high cholesterol, we don\u2019t hesitate to get treatment. Mental health is no different. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
What can get in the way of the healing process? <\/h3>\n\n\n\n Nordean pointed out a few things that often get in the way for dads and teens as they work through the therapy process: <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Don\u2019t try to fix things <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nWhen their kids are hurting, parents want to fix it. Without falling into stereotypes, it does seem a more common response for dads to respond to an issue by offering solutions. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cWe work on that a lot, on not being \u2018the fixer,\u2019\u201d Nordean said. \u201cAllowing their kid to express emotion so they have an experience of feeling heard, understood, and felt, that can be uncomfortable for dads.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Work on your parenting relationship <\/strong><\/p>\n\n\n\nWhether you\u2019re partnered or married to your teen\u2019s mother, or if you are divorced and not together, you need to be focused on what\u2019s best for your teen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
\u201cIf parents are divorced or are in a contentious relationship with their ex, and they’re not willing to work on that, then the hope is pretty dismal that their kid will be able to do the work,\u201d Nordean said. \u201cSo, work on your individual issues first, the parenting relationship second, and then<\/em> focus on your kid.\u201d <\/p>\n\n\n\nThis may seem backward, but these relationships within healthy families lay a strong foundation for your teen. They provide the environment where real healing happens for children\u2019s mental health. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Rewarding Mental Health Care for You and Your Teen <\/h2>\n\n\n\n As a dad, you have a significant role in helping your teen heal when they have a mental illness and\/or are in need of mental health care, but you may not know where to go or what to do. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
Prioritize your relationships: with yourself, your spouse or parenting partner, and your teen. Some of this may be new territory for you or particularly challenging \u2013 but this prioritization is crucial for real healing to happen. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
When you\u2019re willing to work on your own mental health and relationships and engage in family therapy with your teen, you\u2019re helping everyone lay a foundation for a more solid future. <\/p>\n\n\n\n
If your teen and family need extra support with a mental health condition or general well-being, find programs that strengthen those relationships because that\u2019s how sustainable healing happens. It\u2019s an investment that will pay dividends over the long term! <\/p>\n","protected":false},"excerpt":{"rendered":"
When things seem to come unraveled, and your teen needs mental health care, it\u2019s hard to know what to do and how to seek help. Parenting a child who struggles with mental health can elicit a range of emotions, some of which can lead to counterproductive outcomes. When you feel out of control, helpless, and uncertain about your…<\/p>\n","protected":false},"author":27,"featured_media":20340,"comment_status":"closed","ping_status":"closed","sticky":false,"template":"","format":"standard","meta":{"footnotes":""},"categories":[968],"tags":[128,1740,1742,1743],"yoast_head":"\n
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